How to Stop Compulsive Shopping

How to Stop Compulsive Spending

Recognising spending triggers and knowing what you can do about them when they hit is critical to getting free from the mental and financial trap that is commonly known as compulsive buying disorder.

Do you find yourself succumbing to the irresistible urge to shop, even when you know that you either don’t need it and/ or you really don’t have the money for it? You’re not alone. Compulsive shopping, also known as compulsive buying disorder or shopping addiction, affects many individuals worldwide. It’s a challenging habit to break, but with the right strategies and a friendly guide, you can regain control over your finances and overcome this addiction.

Recognizing Compulsive Shopping

The first step in overcoming compulsive spending is recognizing the signs. Here are some common indicators that you might be struggling with this habit:

Frequent Impulsive Buying

Do you often find yourself purchasing items you don’t need on a whim, without careful consideration? Compulsive spending often involves impulsive purchases that can lead to financial strain and cluttered homes.

Financial Stress

Are you experiencing financial difficulties due to excessive spending and credit card debt? Compulsive spending can have severe financial consequences, including mounting debt and strained budgets.

Emotional Triggers

Do you turn to shopping as a way to cope with stress, anxiety, or other emotions? Many individuals use compulsive spending as a temporary escape from life’s challenges, but it often exacerbates emotional distress in the long run.

Harmful Consequences

Have your spending habits led to legal problems, strained relationships, or negative impacts on your well-being? Recognizing the harmful consequences of compulsive spending is a crucial step toward change.

If any of these signs resonate with you, it’s time to take action and regain control.

Strategies for How to Stop Compulsive Shopping

Learning how to stop compulsive and adictive behaviours is very much about the journey – not the destination. Knowing what to do ismn’t rocket science but doing it regularly – even when it gets really tough – thats where the magic happens.

1. Create a Budget and Stick to It

One of the most effective ways to curb compulsive spending is to establish a realistic budget. Here’s how to get started:

Track Your Spending

Begin by tracking all your expenses for a month. This will help you understand where your money is going and identify areas where you can cut back.

Set Financial Goals

Define clear financial goals, such as paying off debt, building an emergency fund, or saving for a specific purchase. Having a purpose for your money can motivate responsible spending.

Allocate Funds

Allocate specific amounts to different spending categories, including necessities, savings, and discretionary spending. Be sure to leave room for occasional indulgences.

Use Cash or Debit

Consider using cash or a debit card for daily expenses, as it can make you more mindful of your spending. Leave your credit cards at home to reduce the temptation of impulse purchases.

2. Identify and Manage Triggers

Compulsive spending often has emotional triggers. Recognizing and managing these triggers is essential:

Keep a Journal

Maintain a journal to track your spending habits and the emotions associated with each purchase. This can help you identify patterns and gain insights into your behavior.

Practice Mindfulness

Develop mindfulness techniques to become more aware of your emotions and impulses. Before making impulsive purchases, pause, take a deep breath, and consider whether the purchase aligns with your goals.

Seek Professional Help

If emotional triggers seem overwhelming, consider seeking support from a therapist or counselor specializing in addiction or compulsive behavior. They can provide valuable strategies and coping mechanisms.

3. Remove Temptation to help with impulse control

Making it more difficult to shop impulsively can be a game-changer:

Unsubscribe

Unsubscribe from marketing emails and newsletters that tempt you to shop. Clicking that “unsubscribe” button can save you from countless impulse purchases.

Limit Access

Delete shopping apps from your devices and remove your stored payment information from online stores. Creating barriers to spending can give you time to reconsider purchases.

Set Limits

Establish clear spending limits for yourself and stick to them. If you reach your limit for a particular category, don’t make additional purchases until the next budget cycle.

4. Find Healthy Alternatives

Replace compulsive spending with healthier coping mechanisms:

Cope with Stress

Explore stress-relief techniques such as meditation, exercise, or pursuing hobbies to channel your emotions positively. Engaging in activities you enjoy can be a fulfilling alternative to shopping.

Connect with Supportive People

Share your struggles with trusted friends or family members who can provide emotional support and encouragement. Sometimes, talking openly about your challenges can alleviate the urge to shop.

Join a Support Group

Consider joining a support group for compulsive shoppers. Sharing experiences and strategies with others facing similar challenges can be empowering. It reminds you that you’re not alone on this journey.

5. Seek Professional Help When Needed

Don’t hesitate to seek professional assistance if compulsive spending is significantly impacting your life:

Therapy

Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and other therapeutic approaches can address the underlying causes of compulsive spending and provide strategies for change. A qualified therapist can help you develop healthier spending habits and cope with emotional triggers.

Financial Advisor

Consult a financial advisor who specializes in helping individuals overcome debt and improve financial management. They can assist in creating a customized financial plan tailored to your needs and goals.

Embrace the Journey to Financial Freedom

being able to stop compulsive shopping is a journey, not a destination.

Be patient with yourself and celebrate small victories along the way. Changing behavior takes time, but with determination and these actionable tips, you can break free from these debilatating habits and enjoy the financial freedom you deserve.

Remember, you’re not alone, and there is support available to help you on your path to a healthier relationship with money. Embrace this journey toward financial freedom, and with each step, you’ll move closer to a brighter and more financially secure future.

Continuing on this path to financial freedom means acknowledging that change is not an overnight transformation but a series of steps and choices. Here are some additional insights and tips to guide you along your journey:

6. Embrace a Minimalist Lifestyle to Help Control Your Spending

Adopting a minimalist lifestyle can be a powerful antidote to compulsively distracting yourself with shopping. Minimalism encourages you to prioritize experiences and meaningful relationships over material possessions. Consider decluttering your living space and simplifying your surroundings. As you declutter, you may also discover items you can sell, putting extra cash toward your financial goals.

7. Reward Yourself in Non-Material Ways

Shift your focus from buying things to rewarding yourself in non-material ways. When you achieve a financial milestone or resist an impulse purchase successfully, treat yourself to experiences like a day outdoors, a favorite hobby, or quality time with loved ones. These rewards can be just as satisfying as material possessions, if not more so.

8. Stay Informed and Educated about Addiction

Knowledge is a powerful tool on your journey to overcome compulsive behaviour. Educate yourself about personal finance, budgeting, and investment strategies. The more you understand your financial situation, the more empowered you’ll be to make informed decisions that align with your goals.

9. Monitor Your Progress

Regularly review your financial progress and celebrate your achievements. Track your savings, debt reduction, and improved spending habits. Celebrate even small victories, as they contribute to building your confidence and commitment to change.

10. Cultivate Patience and Self-Compassion

Breaking free from this addiction may involve occasional setbacks. Understand that relapses can happen, and it’s essential to treat yourself with compassion when they do. Instead of dwelling on mistakes, focus on what you’ve learned and how you can continue to improve.

11. Share Your Successes and Challenges

Share your journey with trusted friends or family members who can offer encouragement and support. Having an accountability partner can help you stay committed to your goals. Consider discussing your progress, challenges, and strategies for resisting the urge to go shopping and buy something with someone you trust.

12. Seek Professional Financial Guidance

If you’re struggling with significant debt resulting from your struggle with compulsive shopping, consider reaching out to a credit counselor or debt management program. They can work with you to create a structured plan for paying off debt and regaining control over your finances.

13. Give Back to Others

Engaging in acts of kindness and giving back to the community can provide a sense of fulfillment that goes beyond material possessions. Volunteer your time or resources to causes that resonate with you. Contributing to the well-being of others can shift your perspective on what truly matters in life.

14. Stay Mindful and Stay Committed

Remember that overcoming compulsive spending is an ongoing process. Stay mindful of your goals and continue practicing self-awareness. By staying committed to change and consistently applying the strategies you’ve learned, you’ll gradually reshape your relationship with money.

15. Celebrate Your Financial Freedom

As you progress on your journey, you’ll notice positive changes not only in your financial situation but also in your overall well-being. The sense of accomplishment that comes from conquering compulsive shopping disorder and gaining control over your finances is a remarkable achievement. Celebrate this newfound financial freedom with pride.

Final Thoughts

Breaking free from this condition is a significant achievement that requires dedication, self-reflection, and resilience. While the path may have its challenges, each step forward brings you closer to a life of financial security, peace of mind, and a healthier relationship with money.

Embrace this journey as an opportunity for personal growth and transformation. By applying the strategies, seeking support when needed, and staying focused on your goals, you can overcome this consistant need to spend money and unlock a brighter financial future filled with possibilities. Your financial freedom awaits, and you have the strength to reach it.

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Shopaholics Anonymous UK

Shopaholics

Shopaholics Anonymous UK

Compulsive shopping, shopping addictions, or compulsive buying disorders are part of a recognised set of mental health addiction disorders and should not be taken lightly.

There are a number organisations and programs both in the UK and globally that can help with treatment for addictive behaviours, but there is no dedicated shopaholics anonymous the same way that we have Narcotics Anonymous, Alcoholics Anonymous and Overeaters Anonymous.

In the UK, our default reaction when we need to address any health issue is to look to the NHS, and whilst they do provide mental health services, their resources are massively overstretched so finding timely and dedicated treatment for shopping addiction might be something that is better addressed via an alternative route.

The good news is that there are a great many organisations to choose from when it comes to treating “oniomania” (shopaholicism), many of them are limited by the budget you have available to spend on them, but that doesn’t mean it’s the end of the line if your credit cards are already maxed out with all those shopping sprees.

Check out my post on 29 Tips for the Recovering Shopaholic if you are still on the fence as the whether your slightly out of control spending habits are bad enough to classify as an addiction just yet. However, the very fact that you are looking for this information means that you want help, so whatever name you want to give it – high five for getting it sorted!

If you just want some UK based support then read on…

Shopping addiction

Shopping habits are generally not seen as something that has the potential to create addiction but it’s exactly that which causes us to dismiss “a bit too much” shopping as a harmless pastime that just makes us feel better for a short time.

there is a really good list in THIS POST that might help you decide if your harmless pastime has tipped over the edge into something that’s not the best for you or your family’s mental and financial health.

One quite sobering thought that helps me personally was this quote from Warren Buffet:

“Start early,” Buffett said. “I started building this little snowball at the top of a very long hill. The trick to have a very long hill is either starting very young or living to be very old.”

Basically, every penny NOT invested now is thousands lost for your future self. Imagine all the money you are spending now that you could be investing. I know this sounds boring but the numbers are really compelling.

Compulsive Spending

According to a 2021 survey by Money and Mental Health Policy Institute, 24% of UK adults reported struggling with compulsive spending. Treatment options for compulsive spending include cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT), debt counselling, and support groups such as Debtors Anonymous.

The average personal debt in the UK has fluctuated over the past 10 years. According to data from the Bank of England, the average household debt in the UK was £60,526 in 2020, up from £54,323 in 2010.

Interestingly the average credit card debt and unsecured debt amounts in the UK over the last 10 years were on a steady incline until the pandemic. Whilst this of course does not mean that we are a nation of shopping addicts, it does speak to how normalised it is for us to spend without the cash to back it up.

Year	Average Credit Card Debt (GBP)	Average Unsecured Debt (GBP)
2012	2,447	3,081
2013	2,340	3,052
2014	2,370	3,187
2015	2,427	3,375
2016	2,551	3,677
2017	2,613	3,847
2018	2,649	3,841
2019	2,617	3,882
2020	2,634	4,264
2021	1,962	3,724

Sources:

Compulsive spending help UK

Debtors Anonymous UK provides support groups for people with compulsive spending and debt problems. They have meetings in various locations throughout the UK. (source: Debtors Anonymous UK)
Money and Mental Health is a charity that offers support and advice for people with mental health problems that affect their finances, including compulsive spending. They have a helpline and online resources. (source: Money and Mental Health)
The Money Advice Service is a government-backed organization that offers free advice on managing money and debt. They have online resources and a helpline. (source: Money Advice Service)

Rehab Clinics & Therapy

It is rare that a spending habit will become so out of control that it requires rehabilitation, there are a range of therapies, support organisations and if necessary medications out there to provide all the tools you need to resolve or at least better manage the issues in your life that are causing you to turn to retail therapy for a release before you’ll need rehab.

I’ve personally found Better Help to be an invaluable resource and would highly recommend them – just be sure to choose your therapist carefully and make sure you get one that fully understands the issues that you want to work on.

If you do feel like you need a more hands on approach, this list of clinics might give you a good starting point:

Castle Craig Hospital – https://castlecraig.co.uk/
The Priory Group – https://www.priorygroup.com/
UK Addiction Treatment Centres – https://www.ukat.co.uk/
The Life Works Community – https://www.lifeworkscommunity.com/
The Providence Projects – https://www.providenceproject.org/
The Edge – https://theedgerehab.com/
Smarmore Castle Private Clinic – https://smarmore-rehab-clinic.com/
Sanctuary Lodge – https://www.sanctuarylodge.com/
Broadway Lodge – https://www.broadwaylodge.org.uk/
The Dawn Rehab – https://thedawnrehab.com/
The Kusnacht Practice – https://kusnachtpractice.com/
The Haynes Clinic – https://www.thehaynesclinic.com/
The Ocean Recovery Centre – https://oceanrecoverycentre.com/

Help for Shopping Addiction UK

The NHS offers cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) and other treatments for addictive behaviours. You can talk to your GP about getting a referral. (source: NHS)
Overeaters Anonymous (OA) is a support group that offers help for people with various types of compulsive behaviours, including shopaholics. They have meetings in various locations throughout the UK, as well as online meetings. (source: Overeaters Anonymous UK)
Mind is a charity that provides support and advice for people with mental health problems, including those that may contribute to compulsive shopping behaviour. They have a helpline and online resources. (source: Mind)
Gamblers Anonymous is a support group that offers help for people with gambling addiction, which can sometimes be linked to being a compulsive shopper. They have meetings in various locations throughout the UK, as well as online meetings. (source: Gamblers Anonymous UK)
The Royal College of Psychiatrists provides information and advice on various mental health issues, including out of control spending behaviour. They have online resources and a directory of mental health services. (source: Royal College of Psychiatrists)
The Samaritans is a charity that provides emotional support for people in distress, including those who may be struggling with compulsions. They have a helpline and online resources. (source: The Samaritans)
The Addiction Helper is a free referral service that can help individuals find treatment options for various types of addiction, including behavioural addiction. They offer a confidential helpline and online resources. (source: The Addiction Helper)
The Centre for Anxiety Disorders and Trauma (CADAT) is a treatment centre that provides cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) and other treatments for anxiety related disorders. They are located in London. (source: CADAT)
The Priory Group is a private mental health care provider that offers treatment for various types of addiction. They have several locations throughout the UK. (source: The Priory Group)
The Salvation Army is a charity that provides support and advice for people struggling with various issues, including mental health conditions. They have a helpline and online resources. (source: The Salvation Army)
Smart Recovery UK is a support group that offers help for people with various types of addictive behaviours. They have meetings in various locations throughout the UK, as well as online meetings. (source: Smart Recovery UK)

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Shopaholics Anonymous NYC

Shopaholics

Shopaholics Anonymous NYC

Local Support Groups and Online Resources

Living in a bustling city like New York, it can be difficult to resist the temptation of the countless shops and retail therapy opportunities. If you find yourself struggling with compulsive shopping addiction, you’re not alone. There are several local support groups and treatment options in New York City that can help you regain control over your addiction to shopping and improve your overall well-being.

One such resource available to you is The Recovery Village, who provide a range of resources dedicated to helping individuals suffering from shopping addiction. Additionally, organizations such as Debtors Anonymous and Spenders Anonymous also offer support within the New York City area. Whether you prefer in-person meetings or online support groups, these resources can provide valuable guidance and encouragement on your journey toward recovery from compulsive shopping.

Besides support groups, there are professional therapists and addiction experts in the city who specialize in treating shopping addiction. With their help, you will be able to address the underlying emotional and psychological issues that contribute to your compulsive spending. Remember, reaching out for help is the first step towards regaining control of your life and overcoming your shopping addiction.

New York Local Support Groups

Help for shopping addiction is far more effective when you have access to local support groups and resources.

Unfortunately there is not currently a single comprehensive (and up to date) list of dedicated spending addiction groups to be found anywhere (I’ve looked!) so I’ve collected together the best I can find that deal with compulsive behaviors of all kinds and noted them throughout this article and my 29 Tips for the Recovering Shopaholic where I have listed all the resources I’ve found to date, that cover the various aspects of recovery.

Understanding Shopping Addiction

Shopping addiction, also known as compulsive buying disorder, affects many people and can lead to serious financial and emotional consequences. As someone who is addicted to shopping, you may experience the compulsion to spend money, often to alleviate negative emotions like anxiety or depression, which can ultimately cause problems in other areas of your life Verywell Mind.

According to an excellent article in Healthline, and an equally compelling one from The Very Well Mind: a person with a shopping addiction may:

obsess over making purchases on a daily or weekly basis / Always thinking about things they plan to purchase
shop to cope with stress or alleviate sadness / depression
max out credit cards or open new ones without paying off previous balances
feel intense euphoria or excitement after making purchases
buy unnecessary things or purchase items that go unused
steal or lie in order to continue shopping
Lying about things they have bought or hiding their purchases
feel regret or remorse over purchases, but continue to shop
be unable to pay off debt or manage money
Being unable to stop their compulsive shopping

Compulsive Buying Disorder (CBD)

In 2017, The World Psychiatry Journal stated that: “Compulsive buying disorder (CBD) is characterized by excessive shopping cognitions and buying behavior that leads to distress or impairment”(Black DW. A review of compulsive buying disorder. World Psychiatry. 2007 Feb;6(1):14-8. PMID: 17342214; PMCID: PMC1805733.)

Whilst this is interesting, it really doesn’t help when you are caught in the throws of a major spending frenzy, desperately trying to resist the next one, or just having a panic attach over your credit card bill.

Knowing that that is actually classified as a mental health disorder can however make us feel slightly less alone and crazy for our compulsions, especially one that is not really viewed by the rest of the world as “serious”.

In fact the very act of taking this seriously could be the first real step towards finding a solution that actually works for you.

Check out my 29 Tips for the Recovering Shopaholic for more information on how you can reframe your issue and start to find a real solution.

Shopaholics Anonymous NYC

Shopping addiction support groups and organizations in New York City cater to those struggling with shopping addiction, they are however quite difficult to find and appear to be rolled into those groups that cater for a more generalised substance use disorders such as Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics anonymous and over eaters anonymous.

Whilst these might not be the kind of groups that you feel would be the best fit for you as a compulsive spender, they are best placed to point you in the right direction for ones that are, so it’s still worth getting in touch.

There is one online resource: Spenders Anonymous, which offers a list of some in person meetings options but the it’s unfortunately not well maintained, so it may be more advisable to search through online forums 1st.

In person meet up groups are of course an invaluable resource as they provide a safe space for individuals facing any form of compulsive behavior to share their experiences and find helpful guidance from others going through similar challenges, but these are not always available to us and although shopping addiction is not overtly recognised as an addiction, NA, AA & OA support groups are more than happy to accommodate anyone with a compulsive disorder.

In addition to in-person support groups, there are online resources and forums available to help you overcome shopping addiction. Websites like In The Rooms offer online meetings, supportive communities, and access to professionals that can provide guidance.

Utilizing these resources, both locally in New York City and online, can provide you with the tools and support needed to alleviate the burden of shopping addiction, create a robust treatment plan and defined action steps and consequently improve your overall well-being.

Besides the abovementioned groups, you may also consider joining Debtors Anonymous. This support group is beneficial for people who have incurred debts due to their shopping addiction, helping them develop better money management skills and financial responsibility.

To connect with a strong online community, consider web-based support forums and chat rooms designed for shopping addiction recovery. These digital spaces provide you with access to both local and international support networks, allowing you to tap into a wealth of resources and shared experiences.

Remember, you don’t have to face your shopping addiction alone. Reach out to these supportive groups and organizations in New York City, and start your journey towards a healthier, more balanced life.

Debtors Anonymous

Debtors Anonymous (DA) is a 12-step program designed to help individuals overcome compulsive shopping and debt problems. DA offers meetings and telephone conferences for those seeking support in their recovery journey. To find meetings in New York City, you can call the General Service Office of Debtors Anonymous at 800-421-2383.

The United States Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) operates a 24-hour hotline for people wanting help with addiction: 1-800-662-HELP. Additional options include the following:

Search the internet for local addiction or crisis hotlines
Call the addiction hotline at The Recovery Village at 866-923-0591
Call the General Service Office of Debtors Anonymous at 800-421-2383

Financial Support For Overspenders

Learning how to manage your finances is key to overcoming shopping addiction. Local money management classes and workshops can provide you with the necessary skills to regain control of your financial life. You can check your local community centers or educational institutions for information on financial workshops and classes available in your area.

Getting support is fantastic and absolutely something that can be a lifeline for many of us, however there is also something to be said for taking ownership of your problem.

Even if you landed in this situation through traumatic situations outside of your control where shopping has become our socially acceptable coping mechanism, taking ownership and therefore control of it is incredibly empowering.

I have a few free tools that you might find useful if you just want to start somewhere, these might help you out.

Online support groups can also be essential to your recovery.

wherever you are in the world, Facebook has some great communities for all manor of things, you never know, it could just be that last part of the puzzle to help you out.

Shopping Addiction Treatment

Receiving support from a mental health professional and attending therapy sessions can be a crucial step in overcoming your shopping addiction. Consider reaching out to the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357 for information on support and treatment facilities in your area. This helpline will connect you to local professionals and resources that can help you on your path to recovery.

I’ve personally had great success with Better Help, though there are a number of similar sites such as GoodTherapy, where you can find therapists who specialize in treating compulsive spending and shopping addiction. These sites allows you to search for therapists in your area or explore online therapy options for additional convenience.

Keep in mind that seeking help and support is a vital part of overcoming shopping addiction. Utilize these online resources and refine your path to a healthier and more balanced lifestyle.

Tips for Managing Shopping Addiction

No matter where you are in your journey towards recovery, these tips can help you manage your shopping addiction and regain control of your life:

1. Seek Support: Joining a local support group is a great way to connect with others experiencing the same challenges. You can also reach out to the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357 for information on support and treatment facilities in New York City.

2. Create a budget: Developing and sticking to a strict budget can help curb your spending habits. Track your expenses, set spending limits, and prioritize your financial goals. (check out our free ones HERE)

3. Use Positive Affirmations: Replace negative thoughts with positive affirmations, like those suggested by DebtHelpTools, to combat the urge to shop. Examples include “I make the right choices for my life every day” and “I have the power to control my spending habits.”

4. Find Alternative Activities: Instead of shopping, try engaging in activities that promote your physical, mental, and emotional well-being. Consider exercise, reading, or spending time with friends and family.

5. Limit Access to Credit: Limit your access to credit cards and online shopping sites. Remove saved payment information from online retailers, and carry cash or use a debit card for essential purchases.

6. Develop Healthy Coping Strategies: Learn to manage stress and cope with negative emotions in healthier ways. Practices such as deep breathing, meditation, or counselling can be helpful alternatives.

Remember, recovery is a journey, and it’s essential to take it one step at a time. Surround yourself with a strong support system, and don’t hesitate to seek help when needed.

For more tips, tricks and useful resources, check out 29 Tips for the Recovering Shopaholic

If you are looking for UK resources, please GO HERE

Shopaholics Anonymous NYC Read More »

Shopaholics Anonymous – 29 Tips for the Recovering Shopaholic

Shopaholics

Are you a retail warrior seeking genuine happiness beyond the shopping cart? Being in Shopaholics Anonymous isn’t just about curbing the urge to splurge; it’s about understanding the emotional drive behind compulsive shopping. Dive deep into the shopaholic’s mindset, from the dopamine rush of a sale to the underlying triggers like stress or boredom. Embrace minimalism, find alternative joys, and seek support. Remember, true happiness isn’t tagged with a price. Ready to embark on a journey towards real, unboxed joy? Discover the roadmap to retail recovery and lasting fulfilment. 🛍️➡️🧘🎤🖌️🌟

Compulsive shopping, shopping addictions, or compulsive buying are part of a recognised addiction and should not be taken lightly. There are specific organisations and programs that can help with your over-shopping habits, these vary across the globe but in the US they can be found by searching for things such as “Shopaholics Anonymous” (Schulman Centre) and Debtors Anonymous. Check out our UK shopaholics post or read on for global support networks

Shopaholics Anonymous

We’ve all heard of Alcoholics Anonymous – or AA. A community of people who want to change their obsessive compulsive by giving up alcohol and deciding to abstain from even the smallest amount. The same organisation can be found for drugs (NA – Narcotics anonymous) and food addictions.

Unfortunatly at the time of writing, Shopaholics Anonymous is not a real organisation like AA. But you might find a specialist group near you that supports compulsive buying tendencies especially if you live close to a large city.

In all honesty, SA (shopaholics Anonymous) is just about the community and support it provides – so it’s as “real” as the group of like minded people you find to support you. Just because they don’t have an official website or registered business doesn’t mean that they aren’t real – it depends on your definition I guess.

Shopping addictions, or compulsive buying are part of recognised addictive behaviour sets (See the NCBI article here) and should not be taken lightly though they are often dismissed as “minor” by society when they can cause as much if not more harm to both the sufferers, their families and their wider community.

Using the 12 steps for a shopping addiction – Can it work?

People who join Alcoholics Anonymous are presented with a 12 step program to help them beat their addictions. It is a set of spiritual steps that aid in the recovery from alcohol abuse but has been adapted to address many other forms of addiction.

It is interesting to note that this group is not just for alcoholics – you don’t have to have a drinking problem to join. You can also be the friends and family of an alcoholic.

In this article, we will take a look at a set of 12 steps that are use in AA & NA and how they can be used for shopaholics.

Shopping to fill an emotional need

Most of the time, shopaholics or shopping addicts are motivated to shop to cope with the difficult emotions in their lives.

In extreme cases, addicts can become so focused on purchasing something that everything else in their life just becomes less important – Family, work, friends, cleaning the house, helping out with church or community – everything else turns grey – the only “buzz” or excitement is the current object of your desire.

[I’ve recently written a short Medium.com post with some key points for a recovering shopaholic that you might enjoy…]

Some time ago i came across the author, doctor and work renound addiction specialist “Gabor Mate” who himself was gripped by an obsession to purchase classical music CD’s. It sounds so silly to many of us but his description of the feeling and the compulsion that he felt despite rising debts and the needs of his family was very compelling – find his books on amazon UK HERE or watch this video of the author:

1. The emotional reward for compulsive shoppers

In essence, addictions hijack our reward systems (Dana.org). As humans, we should seek reward from productive and fulfilling activities. These activities produce dopamine in the brain – the happy hormone.

A shopping addiction rewires the brain. It makes you feel happy or “high” with just a tap of a button. When these habits become automatic and unsupervised, you may fall into problems like debt, anxiety, and depression.

2. What drives you to shop?

Before you quit your shopping addiction cold turkey, you need to take an in-depth look at the why behind your addiction. What drives you to shop? Do you find yourself daydreaming about buying a new bag because you’re having a bad day at work?

Is the thought of buying something giving you something to live for? You might need to sit down with a pen and a journal to figure out why you shop so much.

3. Getting off the emotional roller-coaster

When we really think about it: Shopping doesn’t fix anything – it just delays how you deal with important issues for a bit. So, you’re sad, and you go online and order yourself a new laptop. Sure, you feel a bit of a rush and coast on that for days.

But you didn’t get to the root of the problem: What made you sad? There are many ways to cope with your feelings of sadness or emptiness that won’t result in debt and emotional crashes.

4. Mental clutter and physical “stuff.”

Mental clutter means constantly thinking about shopping when you should be doing important things like work or hanging out with your family. A shopping addiction makes you distracted from the life in front of you.

Your shopping addiction makes you collect more and more stuff that you probably don’t have space for. How many of the things that you’ve bought are collecting dust at the bottom of your closet? Take a step back and study the effects of your shopping addiction.

5. Freedom of minimalism – being deliberate about the things you own

What is minimalism? Minimalism is the practice of consciously owning fewer possessions. As a shopaholic, you are probably the complete opposite of a minimalist.

Minimalism calls for intentionality – it means owning only the things that bring value to your life. It gives you freedom from the need to “possess” things. Step off the treadmill of consumerism. Less is better.

6. Action steps to take when you want to shop

Getting rid of a shopping addiction requires a plan. Quitting your compulsive buying will create a hole where your addiction once was. What are you going to start doing when you feel that itch to shop?

Write down a few activities that you think will help you when you want to shop compulsively. Here are some of the activities that can act as coping mechanisms to deal with your addiction:

• Diversions like writing, drawing, or gardening.

• Social coping activities like talking to friends and family or playing with pets.

• Cognitive coping activities like writing down new goals or to-do lists.

• Tension releasers like exercise and yoga.

7. You are not alone – get help

There are tons of people out there who over-shop to deal with emotional pain. The good news? There are also tons of people that have rehabilitated and curbed their shopping addictions. Get help today – whether it’s through therapy or by opening up to loved ones.

There are so many resources for getting over your shopping addiction, especially online. Consider online groups on social media apps like Facebook and Reddit. Here’s a collection of some resources for compulsive buying disorder:

Facebook groups:

Subreddits for shopaholics:

Online programs:

8. Meditate and slow down

The next time you find yourself opening that online shopping app, slow down and take a breath. Try to fight it. Start with one minute of resisting the shopping urge. This is where meditation comes in.

Meditation is a great activity that therapists also use in CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy). Taking deep breaths and spending time with your thoughts can help you to cool your shopping itch.

One free APP you might want to try is “Headspace” or book some time with a qualified counsellor if you really need some 1-2-1 support.

9. Affirmations and reminders

A great way to train yourself to curb your shopping addictions is to set up reminders on your phone so that you can say affirmations to yourself. Affirmations are a powerful way to change how you feel about yourself. Here are some examples of affirmations for a shopping addiction:

• I make the right choices for my life every day.

• I am worthy of living my best life.

• I am in control of my urges.

10. Why you need to retrain your brain

You can always change your mindset. You can start over. You don’t have to judge yourself based on your past. Every day is a new day to beat your compulsive buying and live the life you truly deserve.

You can start to retrain your brain by studying your shopping patterns. The first step is to identify your shopping triggers – the things that bring on the urge to buy new things. When you feel compelled to shop, find alternative activities to keep you busy and away from spending.

11. Don’t replace being a shopaholic with another “…aholic” addiction

Someone who gives up smoking might find themselves taking up a new addiction like food or some other socially acceptable addiction.

This kind of behaviour does not target the root cause of the addiction. Getting to your addiction’s root cause involves identifying your triggers and finding appropriate coping techniques to deal with these triggers.

Addressing addiction is a long term commitment that required support from loved ones and where possible a support group. Replacing your current addiction with another will not pay off those credit card bills or help you deal with whatever is underlying your compulsions.

12. Think about the kids & the people who look up to & care about you

Many people get motivated by a loved one, family members or close friends. They do their best for their friends and family, often more often than they take care of their own health and well-being.

remember that an addiction, however harmless and socially acceptable it may appear, also harms the people around you. Take out some time to think about how your mounting credit card debt, secret loan accounts and potential financial ruin might affect the people close to you. Your kids and the people who look up to you need you to get better.

13. What’s your cost of inaction?

What’s the worst thing that could happen if you managed to get your spending under control? Let’s take a brief look at the potential impact of no more buying new things:

14. Financial impact:

You’re going to be saving a lot more money for the things that will truly bring you joy, you might even be so far down the line that quitting now may even help you to avoid bankruptcy. foreclosure of bailiffs. take a good look at all your credit cards and be honest with yourself about what this actually looks like.

15. Mental impact:

When you dig deep into the truth behind your addiction, you can find out what is really bothering you in your life. It sounds so simple doesn’t it? Please be gentle with yourself at this point in your recovery, you didn’t get here over night so it’s going to take a while to build up some healthier coping mechanisms. Anxiety will be a normal reaction, get some professional assistance and join a support group – you are not alone or strange or weird or even that unusual.

Whilst your own life experiences that have brought you to this place are of course unique to you, addictive behaviour is common place, please never feel alone.

16. Stuff impact:

Think about all those notebooks you bought just because they were cute.

Are they collecting dust in the bottom drawer of your desk?

Don’t you feel suffocated with the lack of space you have for the essentials?

Beating your shopping addiction will bring you more space both mentally and physically.

You may even find that the pleasure of giving far out ways the pleasure you’ve been getting from making the purchase in the first place.

It can honestly be JUST as rewarding to SELL all that stuff that you have now mentally let go of – you might even make money on some of them!

17. Retirement impact:

These days, with financial movements like FIRE (Financial Independence Retire Early), people are rushing to invest their savings and invest money. Addressing your need to shop could mean that you will retire earlier.

18. When you have addressed the emotional – Look at the practical

Addiction is caused by the difficult feelings you feel, how you choose to deal with them, and how the addiction makes you feel afterward (source). The most effective way to deal with an addiction is to get to the root of the problem – this will fix the way you deal with your emotions.

In addition to learning how to cope with your emotions, there is a need to develop a solid plan that will stop you from doing the shopping. The plan will include practical tips for beating back compulsive buying and debt.

We have loads of free and super cheap downloads available in our shop that can help you to get organised. From simple printable budgets to more comprehensive debt tracking calculators, it’s (almost) everything you need to get on track with your finances.

I have just started a new Etsy shop with LOADS of new tools that might help you to get on track too – please check it out HERE

Take practical steps for sustainable recovery

19. Look at your debts:

Take a moment to study the debts you have accumulated over years of compulsive spending. If you stop over buying now, you can save more money and pay off your debts. Check out these free debt worksheet that can help you deal with your finances here.

20. Make a budget:

Educate yourself on the importance of budgeting your money every month. List down the essentials that you need to pay for, and see how much money you have left. Don’t try to be perfect on the first try. Start with small steps. Click here to access some free printable budget worksheets.

21. Consider debt payment plans and consolidations:

Your shopping habit might have accrued debt into your life. To combat this, consider debt payment plans and consolidation programs. These are services that make debt payment a lot easier.

22. Be deliberate:

Commit to being more intentional and conscious with your spending. Remove excess expenditures from your budget. Learn to declutter and upcycle the things that you already have. Read about how to declutter, clean, and make a positive impact on the world.

23. Know it’s a journey, not a destination:

We all know of the 12 steps journey used in addiction groups like Alcoholics Anonymous and Spenders Anonymous. These steps provide a slow but steady guide to addressing compulsive disorders. Ease yourself into this journey – try not to jump feet first into the waters.

24. Seek more knowledge on addictions and compulsivity:

One of the best ways to learn about shopping addiction is to read research articles and books on the topic. There are also many blogs by people who used to have shopping addictions who have overcome their challenges and paid off their debt.

25. Connect with like-minded people online:

Join social media groups where like-minded people share their thoughts and experiences. There are also some great online programs that provide counselling for addictive behaviours.

26. Treat yourself:

Don’t beat yourself up for slipping up. Start with baby steps. Another tip is to plan your shopping treats ahead of time so that you don’t over-spend.

27. Have a back-up plan in place:

Right now, you might be pumped up and ready to kick this shopping addiction to oblivion. However, the smarter option would be to leave some room for failure. If you fall off, don’t be too mad at yourself. Come up with some activities to distract yourself from the temptation of buying new things.

28. Delete online shopping apps from your phone:

Almost all of your favourite stores have apps, making shopping a lot easier. It can be tempting to go on a shopping spree, what with the ease with which you can buy things online. A great option would be to delete the apps off your phone. This will stop you from compulsively buying things.

29. Go for therapy:

A shopping addiction can morph into something life-threatening. If you get the help you need, you stand the chance of beating this addiction and saving yourself from difficult situations. Find a therapist to help you work through your mental health issues. This can help you to live a healthier and happier life.

Elisa Bowman is a very good friend of mind and is truly excellent at counselling people through trauma and addiction – take a look at her page here and drop her a line, i’m sure she’d be more than happy to have a chat about what you need.

PROS of being in “Shopaholics Anonymous”

• Discussions with like-minded shopping addicts

• A platform to ask questions about your addiction

• Answer other’s questions based on your own experiences

CONS of being in “Shopaholics Anonymous”

• Temporary discomfort while you work through your issues

• The risk of getting offended by other’s opinions

Frequently Asked Questions

1. What do you call a person who is addicted to shopping?

Someone who keeps buying things they probably don’t need is called a shopaholic.

2. How do you know if you have a shopping addiction?

You have a shopping addiction if you go shopping or online shopping when you feel distressed. After shopping, you feel a rush of joy. If this is how you consistently deal with emotions, you may have a shopping addiction. It’s worse if you have to lie and cheat to get money to feed your addiction.

3. Why do I have a shopping addiction?

You have a shopping addiction because you cope with difficult emotions using shopping therapy. Identify the events that make you feel like shopping and replace shopping with healthier coping mechanisms.

4. How do you break a shopping addiction?

Dealing with a shopping addiction works by first identifying your shopping triggers. Do you reach for your Amazon app when your boss yells at you? Find better ways to deal with your difficult emotions like meditation or positive thinking.

5. Is compulsive shopping a mental disorder?

It is not officially a part of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM). However, it might be a type of impulse control disorder or a behavioural addiction.

6. How is compulsive buying disorder treated?

Compulsive buying disorder is treated through behavioural therapy and individual counselling.

7. How do I break my spending addiction?

You can break your spending addiction by replacing it with other activities to divert your attention from shopping, for example, meditation, exercise, or painting.

8. Is compulsive shopping a symptom of depression?

Some people who compulsively shop may use it as a way to cope with depression.

9. Why does shopping make me happy?

Shopping can release dopamine in the brain. Dopamine is the happiness hormone.

10. What causes compulsive shopping?

Generally this happens when someone is addicted to shopping because it makes them feel joy although it can lead to psychological and social issues like depression and debt.

Conclusion

Shopping addictions are responsible for turning thousands of people into empty consumers obsessed with hoarding shiny new objects. Shopping addicts are medicating their stress and anxiety using an unhealthy habit – buying things they probably don’t even need. Worry not, because a shopping addiction can be reversed using a few healthy coping skills. Here are some starting tips for breaking this addiction:

Go to therapy.
Identify your triggers.
Journal about why you shop and how you feel afterward
Write down some affirmations to motivate you not to spend
Meditate
Organise all the stuff you have bought

Check out our posts about getting out of debt and organizing your budget. We have loads of free checklist and helpful tips to help you get your money sorted!

Great books to read include:

Spent: Break the Buying Obsession and Discover Your True Worth – Sally Palaian Ph.D.

Recovery by Russell Brand (i have this on audible and have listened to it 3 times so far! I love it)

To Buy or Not to Buy: Why We Overshop and How to Stop – April Lane Benson

The Paradox of Choice: Why More is Less – Barry Schwartz

Getting Out from Going Under: Daily Reader for Compulsive Debtors and Spenders – Susan B.

Check out our posts about getting out of debt and organising your budget. We have loads of free checklist and helpful tips to help you get your money sorted!

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